Why Dulari rocks?
Radhika Bhirani
rbhirani@gmail.com
It's been a silver lining in the dark clouds of toxic Twitterverse. But have you wondered what is it about Dulari Kher that brings a smile on your face, gets your giggle on, makes you laugh out a little loud sometimes and perhaps makes you love or miss your parents and grandparents a wee bit more?
For the uninitiated, Dulari is the mother of actors Anupam Kher and Raju Kher. Her own unintended journey to becoming a social media sensation, if we may say so, started with her elder son sharing some of her videos first in 2017, with the hashtag #DulariRocks. And that, by now we know, she sure does!
There's something so candid, innocent, goofy, endearing and most importantly, slice-of-life about her videos, that it touches a universal chord.
The son agrees.
"Her connection is amazing. She is a bigger star than I am. People love her so much. Wherever I go, even in America, people ask me about her," Anupam Kher told me a few months ago as we briefly discussed how his mother has been winning hearts... well, by just being herself. Not trying too hard. Not acting. But just being who she is.
"Dulari har ghar mein hai. Aisa ho hi nahin sakta ki Dulari har ghar mein na ho. Har Dadi, har Nani Dulari hai," said the veteran actor, before further explaining, "People basically look for a connection with older people, and the things Dulari does, they have seen their elders do too. It's just that they should not be forgotten."
Dulari's quirks -- calling Anupam Kher 'Ganju Patel' and breaking into guffaws, attempting the Happy Dance challenge, devouring her beloved kheer, her hilarious scolding sessions, her love for Shimla and her favourite TV shows, being a binding factor for the family or her usual snippets of conversation with them -- make for unadulterated entertainment each time.
Sample a recent tweet from Anupam: "First Dulari reprimanded me for wiping my hands on my trousers. Then she saw my growing white beard and called me 'Budhe' (Old Man). After feeling bad she promoted me to the level of a “Sant” Saint)."
While another of their family member tells me that dear Dulari has always had this bindass, joyous, spirited and loving streak about her, Anupam opened up about why he started #DulariRocks in the first place, and what led him to continue it.
"When I used to put out her videos in the beginning, I used to put it out for entertainment. But over a period of time, people started saying that, 'You have given us a chance to look at our elders and ma baap in a new way, with a fresh perspective. And that, I feel, is good."
A dekko at the Twitter or Instagram comments on Dulariji's videos can easily corroborate that: "Watching her happy instantly makes me smile", "She's the best thing on the Internet", "She is so cute and full of positive vibes".
There's Farida Jalal's various Dadi or Nani avatars in films and TV shows, which have been totally endearing. Remember her act as the fun dadi in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai, and the mischievous Nani in Shararat? Talking of TV, who can forget Surekha Sikri's Dadi-sa act from Balika Vadhu -- doesn't it remind you of your strict and stern, yet supportive granny? In fact, Sikri's part as a nagging dadi with a spunk in Badhaai Ho would have struck a chord with all those who have an elder with a sarcasm-laden tongue at home!
There's Rishi Kapoor's role as Dadu in Kapoor and Sons! A friend to his grandkids, he speaks of his love for all things naughty unabashedly. He watches porn, smokes up, applies a facemask, loves the iPapad... oops, iPad, and at the end of the day, just wants his family to be joyous in togetherness. For those with grandparents that have always drawn a big fat line in their relationship, this one sure offers a certain wishfulness.
Take a moment to remember or recognise the quirks and idiosyncrasies of your own Dularis.
rbhirani@gmail.com
For the uninitiated, Dulari is the mother of actors Anupam Kher and Raju Kher. Her own unintended journey to becoming a social media sensation, if we may say so, started with her elder son sharing some of her videos first in 2017, with the hashtag #DulariRocks. And that, by now we know, she sure does!
There's something so candid, innocent, goofy, endearing and most importantly, slice-of-life about her videos, that it touches a universal chord.
The son agrees.
"Her connection is amazing. She is a bigger star than I am. People love her so much. Wherever I go, even in America, people ask me about her," Anupam Kher told me a few months ago as we briefly discussed how his mother has been winning hearts... well, by just being herself. Not trying too hard. Not acting. But just being who she is.
"Dulari har ghar mein hai. Aisa ho hi nahin sakta ki Dulari har ghar mein na ho. Har Dadi, har Nani Dulari hai," said the veteran actor, before further explaining, "People basically look for a connection with older people, and the things Dulari does, they have seen their elders do too. It's just that they should not be forgotten."
Dulari's quirks -- calling Anupam Kher 'Ganju Patel' and breaking into guffaws, attempting the Happy Dance challenge, devouring her beloved kheer, her hilarious scolding sessions, her love for Shimla and her favourite TV shows, being a binding factor for the family or her usual snippets of conversation with them -- make for unadulterated entertainment each time.
Sample a recent tweet from Anupam: "First Dulari reprimanded me for wiping my hands on my trousers. Then she saw my growing white beard and called me 'Budhe' (Old Man). After feeling bad she promoted me to the level of a “Sant” Saint)."
While another of their family member tells me that dear Dulari has always had this bindass, joyous, spirited and loving streak about her, Anupam opened up about why he started #DulariRocks in the first place, and what led him to continue it.
"When I used to put out her videos in the beginning, I used to put it out for entertainment. But over a period of time, people started saying that, 'You have given us a chance to look at our elders and ma baap in a new way, with a fresh perspective. And that, I feel, is good."
A dekko at the Twitter or Instagram comments on Dulariji's videos can easily corroborate that: "Watching her happy instantly makes me smile", "She's the best thing on the Internet", "She is so cute and full of positive vibes".
Give the videos a regular look, and you will trace some similarities -- in the fun, the banter, the laughter, the naugtiness -- with one older member or another of the house. Could be your parents, grandparents or any extended family member. Kyunki Dulari Sach Mein Har Ghar Mein Hai.
In hindsight, it is this element of being relatable that has made a stream of dads, moms, grandmas and grandpas in Bollywood films tick, just as Dulari does. Isn't it?
Think of the motherly and practical Kaveri Amma in Swades. Her simplicity and practicality is something to draw from.
There's Rishi Kapoor's role as Dadu in Kapoor and Sons! A friend to his grandkids, he speaks of his love for all things naughty unabashedly. He watches porn, smokes up, applies a facemask, loves the iPapad... oops, iPad, and at the end of the day, just wants his family to be joyous in togetherness. For those with grandparents that have always drawn a big fat line in their relationship, this one sure offers a certain wishfulness.
Uff, and let's not miss the whiskey-guzzling, gizmo-loving, and progressive Biji of Vicky Donor. Kamlesh Gill surely brought a rare verve to a role that in many ways was the life of the film.
The great Zohra Sehgal, tagged once as a 'mother of all grandmothers on screen', essayed not just an open-minded mum in Cheeni Kum, but also a naughty grandma with peculiar mannerisms in Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam.
The great Zohra Sehgal, tagged once as a 'mother of all grandmothers on screen', essayed not just an open-minded mum in Cheeni Kum, but also a naughty grandma with peculiar mannerisms in Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam.
There are more and more and more...
But just to go back to the non-filmy (or not!?) Dulari, what makes her really rock for me, is how her videos are a reminder of some of my sweetest memories. The more that I see #DulariRocks, the more I am reminded of miss both sets of my grandparents.
I never met my paternal grandfather, but my Dadi, Sheila, was one of a kind. "Moya saap" is a phrase she often used when the snake 'bit' her counter during a fun game of Snakes and Ladders. She always called me 'meri rani'. She didn't mind us singing Sheila Ki Jawaani to her. And the 'tel maalish' remains unmatched. Her happiness when people called me "Dadi ki parchhayi".
My Nani's 'offo', 'doodh peelo', 'nahaa lo', 'khaa lo', 'padh lo'... the loving nudges to be organised and disciplined, her confident thumbs up gesture every time I went out to do or came back after something important, her confidence in an under-confident me, her being the family's AIR, her culinary delights, and her aura as a Jagat-Nani... There's so much I miss every day. As I do about my handsome, charming and doting Nana, who I lost just a year ago.
I never met my paternal grandfather, but my Dadi, Sheila, was one of a kind. "Moya saap" is a phrase she often used when the snake 'bit' her counter during a fun game of Snakes and Ladders. She always called me 'meri rani'. She didn't mind us singing Sheila Ki Jawaani to her. And the 'tel maalish' remains unmatched. Her happiness when people called me "Dadi ki parchhayi".
My Nani's 'offo', 'doodh peelo', 'nahaa lo', 'khaa lo', 'padh lo'... the loving nudges to be organised and disciplined, her confident thumbs up gesture every time I went out to do or came back after something important, her confidence in an under-confident me, her being the family's AIR, her culinary delights, and her aura as a Jagat-Nani... There's so much I miss every day. As I do about my handsome, charming and doting Nana, who I lost just a year ago.
Aaaah.... his love for little gadgets and quirky little objects, funky stationary, music - old and new, golgappe, chaat, meetha, chooran, his kids, grandkids, and what not... Stealing from his goodies cupboard, the fun Delhi-Jaipur drives, making and baking sweets for him... And aaaah, that feeling of nostalgia.
Snap, snap! Elders. They leave a huge void when they leave. Hold them close. Value your conversations with them. Spend time with them. Enjoy their company, and you'll realise the vivaciousness and energy they bring into your lives, and mind you, without trying too hard.
Snap, snap! Elders. They leave a huge void when they leave. Hold them close. Value your conversations with them. Spend time with them. Enjoy their company, and you'll realise the vivaciousness and energy they bring into your lives, and mind you, without trying too hard.
Take a moment to remember or recognise the quirks and idiosyncrasies of your own Dularis.
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