Pavail Gulati: Bas Do Thappad & A Lesson Learnt

Radhika Bhirani
rbhirani@gmail.com

~~~ There's a lot you learn at school, but some of life's best lessons are, perhaps, learnt outside of school.

For Pavail Gulati, the actor whom many recognise as the "Thappad guy", it was a qissa of getting slapped by a school mate, slapping her back, getting slapped again, slapping her once more, and an ensuing apology, that turned into a life-long lesson about why a 'thappad' isn't the answer to anything in life.

"I have never been the one to get into fights, anytime in my life," Pavail had told me one afternoon over a phone chat after Thappad, his maiden film as a male lead, released in February, to a largely positive response.

The Anubhav Sinha directorial, starring Taapsee Pannu, was a consciousness-raising effort which raised questions that matter. And should have always mattered. About deep-rooted misogyny, patriarchal norms, male entitlement, women's conditioning and about raising a hand at someone, especially your spouse, once, twice, or more.

The film's core was simple -- a man who faces the consequences of giving 'Bas Ek Thappad' to his wife -- but its layers complex. I got Pavail to jog his memory a bit, and asked if he had, in real life, slapped another girl.

He narrated.

"There was a classmate. We had a little fight in the school bus while going home. And she slapped me. I slapped her back. Then she slapped me again. And then I slapped her back. And then, she started crying. I had hit her with a lot of force," Pavail recounted. 

When he reached home after the incident, he shared the incident with his mother.

"I told my mom, 'Usne mujhe maara, maine usko maara, aur woh ro padi'. I was feeling like a hero and thought that I had done a great job! But I cannot forget that my mom made me walk to her house (in the same colony), and in front of her parents, made me apologise to her. That was the day I realised, 'Boss you can't do this'," the young actor shared.

It reminded me of the famous proverb out of William Ross Wallace's poem: The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world. Or ruins the world, as the film tells. Essentially, how women, through their children, can influence the change that will change the world -- for better or for worse.

In Pavail's case, another lesson for life came through -- but from another woman.

"During a summer vacation in school days, I had gone to the US. On the airplane, I had called for the air hostess and asked her if I could have some water. I still remember her face. I can't forget that sight when she looked at me, and said 'Please'."

He was, as he said, "embarrassed".

For him, it was a reminder -- rude, polite, or whatever -- of the things we take for granted.

"It made me realise that it's something we don't realise often. We don't say 'Please' and 'Thank you' enough."

In hindsight, he thinks how he had two options at hand back then: "One, where I could have just dismissed her by saying 'You're working for me, go to hell'. Or I could say, 'I'm sorry, I realise my mistake'."

He's just glad about choosing the wiser, the latter. It changed something about him.

"Since then, I've always made it a point to say 'Please', 'Thank you' and 'Sorry'. It's ingrained in my nature. I really think these little things make a person conscious. Perhaps I wouldn't have realised it had she just normalised it," he said, making a point that I have to admit, I agree with.

That Pavail learns his lessons well was evident when he shared how nervous he was about slapping his co-star turned friend Taapsee for the graph-changing slap scene in the film. To make matters worse, he had to slap her seven times to get that 'ek thappad' right.

On a lighter note, he shared, "I told Taapsee, 'Ek kaam kar, tu mujhe maar le. Hit me once so I don't feel that guilty, and as a reaction, I will hit you'. She refused to do that. But yeah, it took us seven takes to get that scene right, and Taapsee took it like a champ. I gave her the longest hug after that and then apologised."

That I can say that Pavail is capable of doing so, has a personal story behind it. It is why the initial mention of school felt so fit to start with for something about Pavail. Because that's what he reminds me of.

Short. Naughty. Talented. Sporty. Sporting. That was Pavail in a nutshell, at New Delhi's Bluebells School International. In Class 6.

It has actually been one of my favourite stories to tell about him. The fact that he stood somewhere around me, a 5-foot, in line for the school assembly for months. Until over one two-month summer vacation -- happens to be the same when he went to the US -- when he gained some 8 inches in height!

And here he is today, chasing the tall order of being an actor -- an 'outsider' in the 'nepotistic' Hindi film industry -- who dares to be choosy and take risks.

Some things about him remain the same from school. His love for basketball. "I still play and still break my ankles," he quipped. And as his Instagram feed vouches for, his #constants, his #BFFs -- his friend circle from school.

Our school, I can proudly say, always nurtured creative talent, never telling us to leave our interests and pursuits for the sake of academic excellence. Out came talents like filmmaker Rakeysh Omprakash Mehra, Oscar-winning producer Guneet Monga, critically acclaimed actor Tannishtha Chatterjee, actors Esha Gupta, Ishita Raj Sharma and Renuka Sharma, film editor Prerna Saigal, and fashion designer Sonal Verma of label Rara Avis.

The school brought us closer to what many schools consider 'extra-curricular', through workshops and plays with the likes of theatre director Feisal Alkazi, and dance sequences personally choreographed by the well-known Ashley Lobo. More than that what it did was toughened us up for the journey ahead.

Pavail would, I assume, agree.

He shifted from Delhi in 2006 after he signed up as a student for a two-year course at a film school, Whistling Woods International. And it took him over a decade of patience, resilience, faith and self-belief, before landing a lead role.

Before that, he worked in ads, dabbled in theatre, found jobs behind the scenes on sets, in TV shows and web series and more. He assisted casting directors such as Shanoo Sharma and Mukesh Chhabra. He also tried his hand at being an assistant director on ads. His tryst with theatre gave him a brush with Naseeruddin Shah.

In 2014 came the series Yudh. It could have been a turning point. But it didn't get the eyeballs one expected. Despite being the project that marked the iconic Amitabh Bachchan's debut in the fiction TV space. Pavail played his onscreen son.

                                                             

Being ousted from films and projects just a day before the shoot, has been a been-there-done-that for Pavail, who chose to stand his ground and wait it out. That wait, he always admits, turned out "worth it".

Year 2019 saw him feature in an episode of widely watched web series Made In Heaven, followed by a part in Kalank. In 2020, which has, one can safely say, been life-changing for all and sundry in different ways, Pavail has been seen in Thappad, Anurag Kashyap's segment in the anthology Ghost Stories, and web series Avrodh: The Siege Within.

In a latest announcement, he has been cast in Omung Kumar's quirky comedy, Janhit Mein Jaari, along with Nushrratt Bharuccha. Considering his past choices, this is yet another brave one. Interesting space too.

"I am hoping," says the young and raring to go actor, for whom 2020 seems to have been unusually a good year.